Custom Carved Wooden Sign - "I Don't Fart, I Whisper In My Panties, Sometimes It's A Scream"
$21.00Ask a question
Haylee's Closet creates custom carved wooden signs for that perfect personalized addition to your home decor. All of our signs are hand painted and lightly distressed for that perfect cottage or country chic feel. Each sign is equipped with saw tooth hooks for easy hanging.
**** MEASUREMENTS ****
This sign measures 10" wide by 10" high and 3/4" thick.
**** HOW TO ORDER ****
1. Click "Add To Cart" at the top of the page and follow the checkout instructions.
2. Color choices are for the BACKGROUND of the sign. We do NOT offer color choices for the text. Colors will be done as shown in our color chart (base color, natural/darkened text). The color chart is pictured in each listing. Our base color is the color that is painted underneath the top coat (the color you choose at checkout), so when the sign is sanded, the base color pops through a little bit. If you would like a base color other than is what is shown in our color chart pic, (or if you would like no base color at all) please request so in the "note to seller" box when checking out.
Feel free to ask any other questions that you may have! Thank you very much!!
PayPal, Direct Checkout and Etsy Gift Cards accepted
Shipping from United States
All items are shipped via USPS Priority Mail (no exceptions). My CURRENT processing time is approximately 4-6 weeks, with an additional 2-5 days domestic shipping (international will take longer). These processing times may change at certain times throughout the year, so please check my shop announcement at www.hayleescloset.etsy.com, or my ABOUT section on my website at www.hayleescloset.com for any updates on processing times.
My signs are made from a heavy birch, cabinet grade plywood so they are not light!!! Etsy calculates shipping rates, automatically, based on your location and the weight/dimensions of the item(s) ordered. If it turns out that you have been vastly overcharged for shipping, I will issue you a refund once your item is packaged and I know the final cost of shipping.
I DO NOT OFFER RUSHED PROCESSING. All orders are processed in the order that they are received. There are times that I am able to get orders shipped out earlier that expected, and there are times that I will not have your order out until the ship date you were given at checkout. (plus additional shipping time). Please plan for this. THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS.
Shipping discounts, on multiple items, will be given automatically at checkout.
Please be sure that the shipping address is correct at checkout. Any packages returned to me as undeliverable, for an incorrect address or for any other reason, will require an additional shipping charge to be re-sent. If a refund is requested at this point in time, only the amount of the product will be refunded. After the shipping label has been printed, no shipping charges will be refunded for any reason.
Only one shipping address per order. If shipping to multiple address, a separate order must be made.
*** Customs and import taxes ***
Buyers are responsible for any customs and import taxes that may apply, as these are out of my control. I am not responsible for delays due to customs.
*** Damaged items during shipping ***
I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ITEMS DAMAGED DURING SHIPPING. All domestic packages are insured for the total purchase price (item charges PLUS shipping charges. For orders less than $100, the packages are insured through USPS. For orders over $100, I purchase additional insurance through a 3rd party (Shipsurance Insurance Services, Inc).
IF YOUR TOTAL PURCHASE PRICE IS LESS THAN $100 ...
YOU must file a claim, online, through USPS at https://www.usps.com/help/claims.htm
Be sure to keep the damaged item AND all of the packaging that the item came in until the claim process is COMPLETE. You will also need your receipt of purchase, which is emailed to you when your order is placed. You will receive the refund directly, if the claim is accepted by USPS. You will need to place a new order through me (at full price) if you would like the item replaced.
IF YOUR TOTAL PURCHSASE PRICE IS MORE THAN $100 ...
I will handle the claim process through the 3rd party insurance company (Shipsurance Insurance Services, Inc). Contact me immediately so I can begin the claim process ASAP. Be sure to keep the damaged item AND all of the packaging that the item came in until the claim process is COMPLETE. I will require pictures of the damaged sign and the packaging. If you no longer have these items, I will be unable to file the claim, and will not be responsible for replacement. There will also be an online form that you will need to fill out for Shipsurance, to verify the damage. I will send you a link for this once the claim is filed. I WILL NOT REPLACE THE ITEM UNTIL THE CLAIM PROCESS IS COMPLETE AND ACCEPTED.
Returns & Exchanges
I gladly accept returns and exchanges
Just contact me within: 5 days of delivery
Ship items back to me within: 14 days of delivery
I don't accept cancellations
But please contact me if you have any problems with your order.
The following items can't be returned or exchanged
Because of the nature of these items, unless they arrive damaged or defective, I can't accept returns for:
- Custom or personalized orders
- Perishable products (like food or flowers)
- Digital downloads
- Intimate items (for health/hygiene reasons)
Returns and exchange details
Custom/personalized orders are NOT returnable. A computerized proof will be sent, via Etsy/Website Convo, for these items. I ask that the proofs be checked and approved by the customer before their order is processed any further. Once approved, I am no longer responsible for any mistakes (incorrect dates, misspellings, grammatical errors, etc). If I do not hear back from you within a timely manner (3-5 days), I reserve the right to either cancel your order, or to run your sign with the info exactly as you provided. No refunds will be given if you provided me with incorrect/misspelled information. So please check your Etsy/Website convo's!!! ***No proof will be sent if your purchase does not involve personalization/customization***
Discounted rates MAY apply for replacement items.
I do accept returns/exchanges on non-personalized/custom products with prior arrangement. (Refunds are NOT available for personalized items) The refund will ONLY be for the price of the product itself. Shipping charges, including return shipping, will be the responsibility of the buyer. The item must be returned within ten days and in its original condition, with no damages or defects.
Please remember that my signs are made of wood, and wood is a natural and beautiful thing. Wood grain, knots and color variations will differ from piece to piece, so no two signs will look identical. These imperfections are NOT to be considered defects. They are what give our signs character. No refunds or exchanges will be given for these reasons.
COLOR, COLOR, COLOR. I offer 25 different primary (background) color choices. These are the ONLY colors that I offer. My color chart, with all 25 colors that I offer, is included with the pictures on each listing. PLEASE KEEP IN MIND that the color that you choose may not match the color chart EXACTLY. There are many different factors when in comes to how my colors look on a finished sign. How thick the paint is applied, how much the sign is sanded, how much of my top/antique coat is applied, etc. All of these processes are done BY HAND, so no two signs will ever be identical when it comes to color. Lighting is also a HUGE factor. As you can see from my images, I take most of my pictures in outside, natural lighting. If you open your package on your kitchen table, under florescent/faux lighting, it's obviously going to look a little different. SO PLEASE BE CERTAIN WHEN CHOOSING YOUR BACKGROUND COLOR. I also do not offer color choices for the text. The wording on my signs is carved into the wood, so when choosing a dark colored background, the text will be the natural wood color. When choosing a light colored background, the process that I use to darken the text makes it a deep brown. My color chart shows which colors will have natural text, and which will have darkened text. THERE ARE SOMETIMES EXCEPTIONS TO THIS. Sometimes, once the signs are carved, there may be some dark/uneven spots that will show. This sometimes will cause some issues on my "medium shade" colors, which may make them hard to read. Some of these colors include my country blue, orange and fiesta pink. Even though the color chart shows these colors having the natural wood text, I may darken the text if I feel the sign is hard to read. This is the risk taken by the customer if these background colors are chosen. *** I reserve the right to refuse any returns/exchanges due to a customer not being happy with the color that they chose at checkout.
My signs are NOT sealed for outdoor use. If you would like to hang your sign outside, be sure to seal it with an outdoor wood sealer before doing so. I WILL NOT return/exchange signs that are damaged due to them being hung outside.
I would love to make something custom for you! I will send you a computerized proof, for all custom signs, once the order is placed. The proofs must be checked and approved by the customer before their order is processed any further. Once approved, I am no longer responsible for any mistakes (incorrect dates, misspellings, grammatical errors, etc). However payment is required before the design process begins.
I have sole ownership of any and all designs that I create, including custom or personalized designs, your wording or mine. I reserve the right to share any and all designs that I create, including custom/personalized designs, on any and all social media.
I reserve the right to sell any and all designs that I create including custom/personalized designs, in any of my retail outlets, including my online stores.
Sizes are not always EXACT. Dimensions could vary up to 1" smaller or larger than the description states.
Please contact me, via Etsy convo, with any questions or concerns that you may have!
Aug 15, 2017
Apr 25, 2015
Have gotten many laughs! Thanks!